Boy hunter bags monster pig

By Mully Mulrooney

Fruithurst, AL (LaughFish.com) - Skippy Carter, an eleven year-old hunter from Alabama is sticking to his story that he shot a 1,000 lb. hog while hiking in the backwoods.  There has been some speculation that the photo of the hog was doctored.  "I'm tellin' y'all the truth.  She was huge," said Skippy.

TB scare hits LaughFish offices

By Patel Patel

Jackson Valley (LaughFish.com) - A LaughFish.com staff member who was on the same flight as a man who had been diagnosed with tuberculosis has been quarantined inside the LaughFish offices until test results are returned.  The unidentified staffer, shown above, is said to be none too happy and has decided to take out his frustrations by licking the keyboard of each pf his colleagues.

Lindsay's mom holds copyright

By Suzay Gomez

Los Angeles, CA (LaughFish.com) - Entrepreneur Magazine is reporting that Dina Lohan, the mother of Lindsay, now holds the copyright for the acronym LMILF.  She explained that "MILF was already taken so I just thought I'd put an L in front."  When asked what the acronym meant, Dina said, "The first two letters are for Lindsay's Mother¿"

Plot against JFK thwarted

By Tyrone Kingston

Queens, NY (LaughFish.com) - Three men have been arrested for plotting to blow up John F. Kennedy.  A third suspect, Abdul Nur, is still at large.  U.S. Attorney Roslynn R. Mauskopf called it "one of the most chilling plots imaginable."  When asked to comment, President Bush said, "I thought Oswald did it."

Speaker quarantined

By Vlad Lattner

Washington (LaughFish.com) - House Speaker Nancy Pelosi was said to be outraged when she was taken into custody recently by government security from the Center for Disease Control.  The CDC said that the Speaker has an infectious disease and must be quarantined for two months.  When asked for a comment, President Bush replied, "Oops.  We must have quarantined the wrong Speaker...hee, hee, hee."

Kevorkian: "Just one more time."

By Sunshine McGhee

Detroit, MI (LaughFish.com) - Jack Kevorkian (79), the pathologist dubbed "Dr. Death," was released Friday after spending eight years in prison for participating in more than 130 assisted suicides.  Kevorkian will be on parole for two years.  Although a general condition of his parole is that he can't kill anyone, the parole board included a special exception.  Said Kevorkian, "The parole board acknowledged that taking out "The Hoff" would put us all out of our misery."

Barry meanders towards Florida

By Chase Storm

Tampa, FL (LaughFish.com) - A disorganized and slow moving Barry moved closer to Florida today.  Residents were told to be on the lookout. Said one Florida resident, "He isn't going to make me sing, is he?"

Andrew Speaker:  "I don't have TB."

By Billy Hawschmidt

Denver, CO (LaughFish.com) - For the first time since being quarantined by the CDC and speaking with "Good Morning America's" Diane Sawyer, Andrew Speaker went on the record with Laughfish.com.  Said Speaker in writing through his attorney, "The truth is I don't have tuberculosis.  It's worse.  The CDC has confirmed that I have the deadly H5N1 Avian Influenza.  I am slowly turning into a duck.  I can no longer give interviews because every other word is a quack.  My doctors tell me that I'll be laying eggs soon. "  Said Speaker's wife Sarah Cooksey, "Let's just say I no longer have a foot fetish."